PSA to the ladies; You’re letting life pass you by!

Published by Bethany on July 20, 2012

Have you ever been in a gym locker room, the women’s side? No? You’d think these people were getting ready for The Miss USA pageant. The pageant goes on all day, every day, but in my opinion the biggest show is in the morning pre-work hours.

Certain gyms are worse than others. Generally, in city or school facilities people are not as concerned about getting all gussied up… maybe they are less likely to have to go to professional jobs or beauty competitions after their morning sweat? I have also noticed that, generally, the more froo froo (expensive) the gym, the more you see giant wheelie suitcases, two outlets worth of hair tools, and three caboodles of makeup.

When I walk into a locker room post swim, the thought goes through my head …no wonder people say they don’t have time to work out. I mean seriously! Think about your life. You only have 168 hours in the week… Let’s say 50 for work and commuting, 50 for sleeping, and welive in Atlanta, so let’s say 15 more just for driving back and forth to sleep and work. Throw in likely 10 more for eating, preparing meals and preparing for those actives. …not to mention 15 for family stuff. Then  perhaps throw in 5-10 for social acitivites, church, etc  so that leaves you, like, 18. And you’re going to spend 15 MORE primping so that you may ( or may not) look one percent more put together than otherwise?



I actually wonder if these ladies are  getting some additional  reward for all that prep work. ..like its some sort of competition, ie.. I am spending this much time fluffing my hair because I am hotter or more important.  Or maybe spending ten minutes solely on curling your eyelashes is just really enjoyable?

Lest you think I’m a sweats to work sort of gal, I’m not a hippy or anything. It’s important to still look as good, or as good as you can look, only in my world the time limit is twenty minutes. You just need to take shortcuts. Let it be known that although I have been known to wear tri shorts to the grocery store, I also do engage in what I would term the important female primping rituals such as regular manicures, pedicures,  and I’m sure, in the future, other secret/ expensive things girls have to do of which men may never know, such as Botox, Fraxel, drinking urine, and finally an eventual hip replacement. 
 
Back to the locker room. Assuming I have pretty much described your routine, let’s break this down. Basically, you have to get to the gym by 5 to get in an hour workout, assuming you need 90 minutes to get ready for  work. You also have to consider all the effort and time that goes into preparing all your caboodles and accessories the night before. So you have a 1/2 ratio of training/preparing. That ratio sucks. You need to make it more like 2.5/.5 to be worth even getting out of bed for.  

Well, lucky for you, I’m going to tell you the secret to everything. Get ready in your car! We live in Atlanta, so I actually feel only small pang of guilt that what I’m advising could potentially lead to a safety issue.

It’s very simple,  really.  First of all, let me let you in on a little hair secret. Chlorine, windows down, and rollers can sometimes lead  to an okay hair day. Swimming in a lake Then using the products/methods I mentioned can lead to a Great hair day! Secondly, you don’t have to look in the mirror to actually do anything expect for eye stuff so save that for when you arrive and don’t sue me.


So with that I have saved some of you up to two hours per day and you can use that free time any way you choose. P.S. if there are published rules to the grooming competition could someone please send them to me? Just in case I find myself in need of a new hobby.